Three kinds of people walk in LA. And courtesy of a dead car battery, Larry becomes one of them and fails to conquer time. Then Larry tells of his longing for McClure’s pickles and of hinge abuses around his house during possibly his most rambunctious hamper update ever.

A John Carradine AND a David Carradine reference in one episode? Plus Larry gets the website address right for 3 weeks in a row? Plus, this is our longest episode ever by 46 whole seconds! You’re welcome! (This IS a half-hour show, you know.)

Pinch yourself. You may be dreaming.

Quote of the week: “It’s just as good as the pickle story.”

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Larry hopes you screwed up Valentine’s Day. Hear why he thinks it’s a good idea to flub this holiday or at least phone it in. See you at the all-night jewelry store!On what seems to be a related matter but is not, Larry once again professes his love of being wrong. Then we hear about a drinker he met on a plane that put him to shame. This, plus a joke, two updates and about 14 topics we never got to on this week’s This Week With Larry Miller!

Quote of the week: “Get a load of you. Get a load of you.”

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Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Sanctimonious loudmouths and hamper slackers alike receive Larry’s high dudgeon this week. Yes, we get another acrimonious (but not sanctimonious) Hamper Update and a bonus joke of the week — all at no extra charge!

Will Larry read the stage direction in the Shari’s Berries ad copy again? Will he slice his face to ribbons again? Smart money is on “Oh, mmmmmaybe.”

How is safety razor shaving related to the movie Network? How is the Hamper Update related the movie Patton? Tune in to our longest and therefore bestest episode ever where the answer to all of these mysteries will be revealed. All questions will be answered. All fears will be allayed.

Over and out from stately Miller manor.

Quote of the week: “With what, a bowie knife?”

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

This episode contains more borscht references than you can shake a soup spoon at. Hear beefy hunk Larry Miller explain the subtle comedic difference between “Ah” and “A-ha.” We get a fistful of updates, including the most acrimonious hamper update to date. Then Larry tells a story about battling with other comics with food in a diner back in the day. This episode is over. Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier!

Quote of the week: “I am ‘In-The-Groove Jackson’ now.”

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Larry is smitten with Lindsay Lohan, Kim Kardashian and Scarlett Johansson. Will his love be requited, even though the top of his head is missing? Larry talks about how hard modeling is. Don’t hate him because he’s beautiful. Then we hear about a woman who wouldn’t believe that Larry was Larry and why you shouldn’t bother starting a diet until after the Super Bowl.

And we have a new update, the update update. Is this the update to end all updates? Or is it no update at all? (A gong rings in the distance.)

That’s it? You’re done reading the episode description? Doesn’t surprise me. You’ve done nothing but complain since you got here.

Quote of the week: “This way, no one knows you’re bald.”

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Larry does an unplanned 20 minute tutorial on making martinis, then apologizes for his previous apologies. This is the first time a drink recipe has included the expressions, “Show it who’s boss,” “Big triple to the power alley” and “Beat it around the fleet.”

As always, all stories are guaranteed true and stirred, not shaken.

Quote of the week: “Fellas, you look lonely. Would you like to meet someone who’s just like you?”

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Hear how to maximize the laughs you can get from an $8 pair of underwear. Plus, we have a lotta errata. Larry offers a REALLY good apology to Ray’s Really Good Beef Jerky. Larry also talks about the joy he gets from being wrong and apologizing. Plus, the joke of the week, a fecta update, plus the story of a boy and his gun. Awwwww.

Quote of the week: “Quick like the bunny. Not slow like the bear.”

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Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Larry talks about spending an involuntary vacation in the snow. Plus, we hear about his search for really good beef jerky, really good pistachios and really good martini olives.Then Larry welcomes the new year, but not for too long. That’s enough. And Larry teases us with the possible existence of an eightfecta, possibly to be known colloquially as the octafecta?

We also have a long overdue and very serious hamper update. And a joke of the week? And a safety razor update? That’s our update update.

Quote of the week: “What are you gonna do on the 4th? Read the Declaration of Independence?”

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Larry starts a new holiday tradition with the retelling of his favorite holiday-related story, colloquially known as “Does He Drink Coffee?” Like a visit from an old friend, it’s great to hear this story re-told.
Plus, we have a visit from our old friends The Joke of the Week (not-so-naughty) and the Safety Razor Update (absolutely nice).

From Larry Miller, Colonel Jeff Fox and Dr. Chris Laxamana, we thank you for being here with us. It means the world to us. Let’s all take the yoke off, if only for a few days. We’ll see you in the new year.

Quote of the week: “What about the flap steak?”

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Show Credits

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje
Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS

Larry muses hypothetical about the possible existence of a level of drinking above level five! Does it have something to do with fractals or worm holes? Or just a hole in your head? String theorists, take a powder, chumps!

We also get a brief history of boy tenors and other vaudeville schtick, a safety razor update and of course, the joke of the week.

Stay tuned past the 42:00 minute mark for a little bonus — Larry’s reaction to this photo being put up on the studio monitor:

Or follow Larry on Twitter @larryjmiller

Show Credits

Executive Producer: Donny Misraje
Producer: Colonel Jeff Fox
Audio Engineer: Dr. Chris Laxamana, LMDS